Thursday, November 24, 2011

We are Experiencing Technical Difficulties

This is the first time I'm writing this blog as myself, and not as 'Thoeba'.
Sorry, but I can't muster her flippant, light-hearted amusement for our planet this week.
You see I lost my publishing contract. Due to illness, my company decided to downsize. Thanks to Canadian shipping costs and distribution issues, I was probably the first one to go.
I don't blame my publisher, she tried her best and is still trying to find Thoeba a new home, but it looks like it will be awhile before we will see Thoeba on a shelf near you.
Don't worry. We're down, but not out. These kinds of things happen, and the only way to deal with it is to move forward.
Thoeba will be her odd and sassy self in no time. Please stand by.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Another Excuse to Play

My writer is a basketcase. As usual. She's planning a Tupperware/Christmas party. Sometimes I think she ENJOYS being stressed out. Like she does it on purpose.
It's her intention to serve food and alcohol, display and demonstrate a few Tupperware products, and keep her guests entertained. She's going to need a lot more beer.
Why does she do it? Even she isn't sure. Personally, I think she's a glutton for punishment. Not to mention she'll use any reason for a party. You humans will employ any excuse for silliness and debauchery. I'm in!

Thursday, November 10, 2011

This planet is disgusting!

My writer is cleaning the house again, top to bottom. Didn't she do this in the spring? I remember, she called it Spring cleaning. Everything was taken off the walls, and those walls were washed. Then she cleans all the pictures and puts them back. She launders all the linens, steams the rugs, and dusts in nooks and crannies no one can even fit into. Now she's doing it again.
She tells me everything gets dirty in a house, whether you can fit into the crannies or not. Why? I asked.
Because of dust, hair, skin cells,etc. But she only has one cat, how much mess can one white feline make? No, she tells me. Dirt comes from outside and dust is in the air. Humans lose hair and skin cells every day.
EEEeeeewww! You mean to tell me EVERYTHING sheds?!

Thursday, November 3, 2011


Ooh. My second Halloween. And I still can't get over how your species has evolved! A mere one hundred years ago your kind spent this time cowering in your hovels expecting to be devoured by denizens of Hell.
Now you deliberately decorate, party, and wear costumes. You even send your miniatures out to ask for candy.
This year I got into it. I disfigured a pumpkin and put out lanterns. I donned a new persona and greeted the wee ones as they flocked to the door. I rather enjoyed it.
But I can't help but notice...You're still handing out food. I think you humans have holidays just so you can indulge in sugar. Not that I blame you. Good thing your kind invented 'the workout'.